Chapter 6

אדֶרֶךְ בְּרִיָּתוֹ שֶׁל אָדָם לִהְיוֹת נִמְשָׁךְ בְּדֵעוֹתָיו וּבְמַעֲשָׂיו אַחַר רֵעָיו וַחֲבֵרָיו וְנוֹהֵג כְּמִנְהַג אַנְשֵׁי מְדִינָתוֹ. לְפִיכָךְ צָרִיךְ אָדָם לְהִתְחַבֵּר לַצַּדִּיקִים וִלֵישֵׁב אֵצֵל הַחֲכָמִים תָּמִיד כְּדֵי שֶׁיִּלְמַד מִמַּעֲשֵׂיהֶם. וִיִתִרַחֵק מִן הָרְשָׁעִים הַהוֹלְכִים בַּחשֶׁךְ כְּדֵי שֶׁלֹּא יִלְמֹד מִמַּעֲשֵׂיהֶם. הוּא שֶׁשְּׁלֹמֹה אוֹמֵר (משלי יג כ) "הוֹלֵךְ אֶת חֲכָמִים יֶחְכָּם וְרֹעֶה כְסִילִים יֵרוֹעַ". וְאוֹמֵר אַשְׁרֵי הָאִישׁ וְגוֹ'. וְכֵן אִם הָיָה בִּמְדִינָה שֶׁמִּנְהֲגוֹתֶיהָ רָעִים וְאֵין אֲנָשֶׁיהָ הוֹלְכִים בְּדֶרֶךְ יְשָׁרָה יֵלֵךְ לְמָקוֹם שֶׁאֲנָשֶׁיהָ צַדִּיקִים וְנוֹהֲגִים בְּדֶרֶךְ טוֹבִים. וְאִם הָיוּ כָּל הַמְּדִינוֹת שֶׁהוּא יוֹדְעָם וְשׁוֹמֵעַ שְׁמוּעָתָן נוֹהֲגִים בְּדֶרֶךְ לֹא טוֹבָה כְּמוֹ זְמַנֵּנוּ. אוֹ שֶׁאֵינוֹ יָכוֹל לָלֶכֶת לִמְדִינָה שֶׁמִּנְהֲגוֹתֶיהָ טוֹבִים מִפְּנֵי הַגְּיָסוֹת אוֹ מִפְּנֵי הַחֹלִי יֵשֵׁב לְבַדּוֹ יְחִידִי כָּעִנְיָן שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (איכה ג כח) "יֵשֵׁב בָּדָד וְיִדֹּם". וְאִם הָיוּ רָעִים וְחַטָּאִים שֶׁאֵין מְנִיחִים אוֹתוֹ לֵישֵׁב בַּמְּדִינָה אֶלָּא אִם כֵּן נִתְעָרֵב עִמָּהֶן וְנוֹהֵג בְּמִנְהָגָם הָרַע יֵצֵא לַמְּעָרוֹת וְלַחֲוָחִים וְלַמִּדְבָּרוֹת. וְאַל יַנְהִיג עַצְמוֹ בְּדֶרֶךְ חַטָּאִים כָּעִנְיָן שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ירמיה ט א) "מִי יִתְּנֵנִי בַמִּדְבָּר מְלוֹן אֹרְחִים":

1It is natural for a man's character and actions to be influenced by his friends and associates and for him to follow the local norms of behavior. Therefore, he should associate with the righteous and be constantly in the company of the wise, so as to learn from their deeds. Conversely, he should keep away from the wicked who walk in darkness, so as not to learn from their deeds.
This is [implied by] Solomon's statement (Proverbs 13:20): "He who walks with the wise will become wise, while one who associates with fools will suffer." Similarly, [Psalms 1:1] states: "Happy is the man who has not followed the advice of the wicked."
A person who lives in a place where the norms of behavior are evil and the inhabitants do not follow the straight path should move to a place where the people are righteous and follow the ways of the good.
If all the places with which he is familiar and of which he hears reports follow improper paths, as in our times, or if he is unable to move to a place where the patterns of behavior are proper, because of [the presence of] bands of raiding troops, or for health reasons, he should remain alone in seclusion as [Eichah 3:28] states: "Let him sit alone and be silent."
If they are wicked and sinful and do not allow him to reside there unless he mingle with them and follow their evil behavior, he should go out to caves, thickets, and deserts [rather than] follow the paths of sinners as [Jeremiah 9:1] states: "Who will give me a lodging place for wayfarers, in the desert."

במִצְוַת עֲשֵׂה לְהִדָּבֵק בַּחֲכָמִים וְתַלְמִידֵיהֶם כְּדֵי לִלְמֹד מִמַּעֲשֵׂיהֶם כָּעִנְיָן שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר וּבוֹ תִדְבָּק. וְכִי אֶפְשָׁר לָאָדָם לְהִדָּבֵק בַּשְּׁכִינָה. אֶלָּא כָּךְ אָמְרוּ חֲכָמִים בְּפֵרוּשׁ מִצְוָה זוֹ, הִדָּבֵק בַּחֲכָמִים וְתַלְמִידֵיהֶם. לְפִיכָךְ צָרִיךְ אָדָם לְהִשְׁתַּדֵּל שֶׁיִּשָּׂא בַּת תַּלְמִיד חָכָם וְיַשִּׂיא בִּתּוֹ לְתַלְמִיד חָכָם וְלֶאֱכֹל וְלִשְׁתּוֹת עִם תַּלְמִידֵי חֲכָמִים וְלַעֲשׂוֹת פְּרַקְמַטְיָא לְתַלְמִיד חָכָם וּלְהִתְחַבֵּר לָהֶן בְּכָל מִינֵי חִבּוּר שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר וּלְדָבְקָה בּוֹ. וְכֵן צִוּוּ חֲכָמִים וְאָמְרוּ (משנה אבות א ד) "וֶהֱוֵי מִתְאַבֵּק בַּעֲפַר רַגְלֵיהֶם וְשׁוֹתֶה בַּצָּמָא אֶת דִּבְרֵיהֶם":

2It is a positive commandment¹ to cleave unto the wise and their disciples in order to learn from their deeds² as [Deuteronomy 10:20] states: "and you will cling to Him."
Our Sages³ [questioned the nature of this command for] is it possible for man to cling to the Divine Presence?⁴ They [resolved the difficulty,] explaining this commandment to mean: Cleave unto the wise and their disciples.⁵
Therefore,⁶ one should try to marry the daughter of a Torah Sage⁷ and marry his daughter to a Torah Sage, eat and drink with Sages,⁸ do business on behalf of Sages,⁹ and associate with them in all possible ways as [Deuteronomy 11:22] states: "to cling to Him."
Similarly, our Sages¹⁰ have directed [us], saying: "Sit in the dust of their feet and drink in their words thirstily."

גמִצְוָה עַל כָּל אָדָם לֶאֱהֹב אֶת כָּל אֶחָד וְאֶחָד מִיִּשְׂרָאֵל כְּגוּפוֹ שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ויקרא יט יח) "וְאָהַבְתָּ לְרֵעֲךָ כָּמוֹךָ". לְפִיכָךְ צָרִיךְ לְסַפֵּר בְּשִׁבְחוֹ וְלָחוּס עַל מָמוֹנוֹ כַּאֲשֶׁר הוּא חָס עַל מָמוֹן עַצְמוֹ וְרוֹצֶה בִּכְבוֹד עַצְמוֹ. וְהַמִּתְכַּבֵּד בִּקְלוֹן חֲבֵרוֹ אֵין לוֹ חֵלֶק לָעוֹלָם הַבָּא:

3Each man is commanded to love each and every one of Israel as himself¹¹ as [Leviticus 19:18] states: "Love your neighbor as yourself."
Therefore,¹² one should speak the praises of [others] and show concern for their money just as he is concerned with his own money¹³ and seeks his own honor.¹⁴
Whoever gains honor through the degradation of a colleague¹⁵ does not have a share in the world to come.¹⁶

דאַהֲבַת הַגֵּר שֶׁבָּא וְנִכְנָס תַּחַת כַּנְפֵי הַשְּׁכִינָה שְׁתֵּי מִצְוֹת עֲשֵׂה. אַחַת מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהוּא בִּכְלַל רֵעִים וְאַחַת מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהוּא גֵּר וְהַתּוֹרָה אָמְרָה (דברים י יט) "וַאֲהַבְתֶּם אֶת הַגֵּר". צִוָּה עַל אַהֲבַת הַגֵּר כְּמוֹ שֶׁצִּוָּה עַל אַהֲבַת עַצְמוֹ שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים ו ה) "וְאָהַבְתָּ אֵת ה' אֱלֹהֶיךָ". הַקָּדוֹשׁ בָּרוּךְ הוּא עַצְמוֹ אוֹהֵב גֵּרִים שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (דברים י יח) "וְאֹהֵב גֵּר":

4Loving a convert¹⁷ who has come to nestle under the wings of the Shechinah¹⁸ [fulfills] two positive commandments: one for he is [also] included among the "neighbors"¹⁹ [whom we are commanded to love]²⁰ and one because he is a convert and the Torah (Deuteronomy 10:19) states: "and you shall love the converts."
[Thus,²¹ God] has commanded us concerning the love of a convert just as He has commanded us concerning loving Himself as [Deuteronomy 11:1] states: "and you shall love God, your Lord."²² The Holy One, blessed be He, Himself, loves converts as [Deuteronomy 10:18] states: "and He loves converts."²³

הכָּל הַשּׂוֹנֵא אֶחָד מִיִּשְׂרָאֵל בְּלִבּוֹ עוֹבֵר בְּלֹא תַּעֲשֶׂה שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ויקרא יט יז) "לֹא תִשְׂנָא אֶת אָחִיךָ בִּלְבָבֶךָ". וְאֵין לוֹקִין עַל לָאו זֶה לְפִי שֶׁאֵין בּוֹ מַעֲשֶׂה. וְלֹא הִזְהִירָה תּוֹרָה אֶלָּא עַל שִׂנְאָה שֶׁבַּלֵּב. אֲבָל הַמַּכֶּה אֶת חֲבֵרוֹ וְהַמְחָרְפוֹ אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאֵינוֹ רַשַּׁאי אֵינוֹ עוֹבֵר מִשּׁוּם לֹא תִשְׂנָא:

5Whoever hates a [fellow] Jew in his heart transgresses a Torah prohibition as [Leviticus 19:17] states: "Do not hate your brother in your heart."²⁴ One is not [liable for] lashes²⁵ for violating this prohibition because no deed is involved.²⁶
The Torah only warns [us] against hating in [our] hearts.²⁷ However, a person who beats a colleague or insults him,²⁸ although he is not permitted to do so,²⁹ does not violate [the prohibition,] "you shall not hate."³⁰

וכְּשֶׁיֶּחְטָא אִישׁ לְאִישׁ לֹא יִשְׂטְמֶנּוּ וְיִשְׁתֹּק כְּמוֹ שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר בָּרְשָׁעִים (שמואל ב יג כב) "וְלֹא דִבֶּר אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶת אַמְנוֹן מְאוּמָה לְמֵרָע וְעַד טוֹב כִּי שָׂנֵא אַבְשָׁלוֹם אֶת אַמְנוֹן". אֶלָּא מִצְוָה עָלָיו לְהוֹדִיעוֹ וְלוֹמַר לוֹ לָמָּה עָשִׂיתָ לִי כָּךְ וְכָךְ וְלָמָּה חָטָאתָ לִי בְּדָבָר פְּלוֹנִי. שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ויקרא יט יז) "הוֹכֵחַ תּוֹכִיחַ אֶת עֲמִיתֶךָ". וְאִם חָזַר וּבִקֵּשׁ מִמֶּנּוּ לִמְחֹל לוֹ צָרִיךְ לִמְחֹל. וְלֹא יְהֵא הַמּוֹחֵל אַכְזָרִי שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (בראשית כ יז) "וַיִּתְפַּלֵּל אַבְרָהָם אֶל הָאֱלֹהִים":

6When one person wrongs another, the latter should not remain silent and despise him³¹ as [II Samuel 13:22] states concerning the wicked: "And Avshalom did not speak to Amnon neither good, nor bad for Avshalom hated Amnon."
Rather,³² he is commanded to make the matter known and ask him: "Why did you do this to me?", "Why did you wrong me regarding that matter?" as [Leviticus 19:17] states: "You shall surely admonish your colleague."
If,³³ afterwards, [the person who committed the wrong] asks [his colleague] to forgive him, he must do so.³⁴ A person should not be cruel when forgiving [as implied by Genesis 20:17]: "And Abraham prayed to God..."³⁵

זהָרוֹאֶה חֲבֵרוֹ שֶׁחָטָא אוֹ שֶׁהָלַךְ בְּדֶרֶךְ לֹא טוֹבָה מִצְוָה לְהַחֲזִירוֹ לַמּוּטָב וּלְהוֹדִיעוֹ שֶׁהוּא חוֹטֵא עַל עַצְמוֹ בְּמַעֲשָׂיו הָרָעִים שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ויקרא יט יז) "הוֹכֵחַ תּוֹכִיחַ אֶת עֲמִיתֶךָ". הַמּוֹכִיחַ אֶת חֲבֵרוֹ. בֵּין בִּדְבָרִים שֶׁבֵּינוֹ לְבֵינוֹ. בֵּין בִּדְבָרִים שֶׁבֵּינוֹ לְבֵין הַמָּקוֹם. צָרִיךְ לְהוֹכִיחוֹ בֵּינוֹ לְבֵין עַצְמוֹ. וִידַבֵּר לוֹ בְּנַחַת וּבְלָשׁוֹן רַכָּה וְיוֹדִיעוֹ שֶׁאֵינוֹ אוֹמֵר לוֹ אֶלָּא לְטוֹבָתוֹ לַהֲבִיאוֹ לְחַיֵּי הָעוֹלָם הַבָּא. אִם קִבֵּל מִמֶּנּוּ מוּטָב וְאִם לָאו יוֹכִיחֶנּוּ פַּעַם שְׁנִיָּה וּשְׁלִישִׁית. וְכֵן תָּמִיד חַיָּב אָדָם לְהוֹכִיחוֹ עַד שֶׁיַּכֵּהוּ הַחוֹטֵא וְיֹאמַר לוֹ אֵינִי שׁוֹמֵעַ. וְכָל שֶׁאֶפְשָׁר בְּיָדוֹ לִמְחוֹת וְאֵינוֹ מוֹחֶה הוּא נִתְפָּשׂ בַּעֲוֹן אֵלּוּ כֵּיוָן שֶׁאֶפְשָׁר לוֹ לִמְחוֹת בָּהֶם:

7It is a mitzvah³⁶ for a person who sees that his fellow Jew³⁷ has sinned or is following an improper path³⁸ [to attempt] to correct his behavior and to inform him that he is causing himself a loss³⁹ by his evil deeds as [Leviticus 19:17] states: "You shall surely admonish your colleague."
A⁴⁰ person who rebukes a colleague - whether because of a [wrong committed] against him or because of a matter between his colleague and God⁴¹ - should rebuke him privately.⁴² He should speak to him patiently and gently,⁴³ informing him that he is only making these statements for his colleague's own welfare,⁴⁴ to allow him to merit the life of the world to come.⁴⁵
If he⁴⁶ accepts [the rebuke], it is good; if not,⁴⁷ he should rebuke him a second and third time.⁴⁸ Indeed, one is obligated to rebuke a colleague who does wrong until the latter strikes him⁴⁹ and tells him: "I will not listen."
Whoever⁵⁰ has the possibility of rebuking [sinners] and fails to do so is considered responsible for that sin,⁵¹ for he had the opportunity to rebuke the [sinners].

חהַמּוֹכִיחַ אֶת חֲבֵרוֹ תְּחִלָּה לֹא יְדַבֵּר לוֹ קָשׁוֹת עַד שֶׁיַּכְלִימֶנּוּ שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ויקרא יט יז) "וְלֹא תִשָּׂא עָלָיו חֵטְא". כָּךְ אָמְרוּ חֲכָמִים יָכוֹל אַתָּה מוֹכִיחוֹ וּפָנָיו מִשְׁתַּנּוֹת תַּלְמוּד לוֹמַר וְלֹא תִשָּׂא עָלָיו חֵטְא. מִכָּאן שֶׁאָסוּר לָאָדָם לְהַכְלִים אֶת יִשְׂרָאֵל וְכָל שֶׁכֵּן בָּרַבִּים. אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁהַמַּכְלִים אֶת חֲבֵרוֹ אֵינוֹ לוֹקֶה עָלָיו עָוֹן גָּדוֹל הוּא. כָּךְ אָמְרוּ חֲכָמִים (גמרא סנהדרין קז א) "הַמַּלְבִּין פְּנֵי חֲבֵרוֹ בָּרַבִּים אֵין לוֹ חֵלֶק לָעוֹלָם הַבָּא". לְפִיכָךְ צָרִיךְ אָדָם לְהִזָּהֵר שֶׁלֹּא לְבַיֵּשׁ חֲבֵרוֹ בָּרַבִּים בֵּין קָטָן בֵּין גָּדוֹל. וְלֹא יִקְרָא לוֹ בְּשֵׁם שֶׁהוּא בּוֹשׁ מִמֶּנּוּ. וְלֹא יְסַפֵּר לְפָנָיו דָּבָר שֶׁהוּא בּוֹשׁ מִמֶּנּוּ. בַּמֶּה דְּבָרִים אֲמוּרִים בִּדְבָרִים שֶׁבֵּין אָדָם לַחֲבֵרוֹ. אֲבָל בְּדִבְרֵי שָׁמַיִם אִם לֹא חָזַר בּוֹ בַּסֵּתֶר מַכְלִימִין אוֹתוֹ בָּרַבִּים וּמְפַרְסְמִים חֶטְאוֹ וּמְחָרְפִים אוֹתוֹ בְּפָנָיו וּמְבַזִּין וּמְקַלְּלִין אוֹתוֹ עַד שֶׁיַּחֲזֹר לַמּוּטָב כְּמוֹ שֶׁעָשׂוּ כָּל הַנְּבִיאִים בְּיִשְׂרָאֵל:

8At first,⁵² a person who admonishes a colleague should not speak to him harshly until he becomes embarrassed⁵³ as [Leviticus 19:17] states: "[You should]... not bear a sin because of him."⁵⁴ This is what our Sages said:⁵⁵ Should you rebuke him to the point that his face changes [color]? The Torah states:⁵⁶ "[You should]... not bear a sin because of⁵⁷ him."
From this, [we learn that] it is forbidden for a person to embarrass a [fellow] Jew.⁵⁸ How much more so [is it forbidden to embarrass him] in public.⁵⁹ Even though a person who embarrasses a colleague is not [liable for] lashes⁶⁰ on account of him, it is a great sin.⁶¹ Our Sages said:⁶² "A person who embarrasses a colleague in public does not have a share in the world to come."
Therefore,⁶³ a person should be careful not to embarrass a colleague - whether of great or lesser stature - in public, and not to call him a name which embarrasses him⁶⁴ or to relate a matter that brings him shame in his presence.⁶⁵
When does the above⁶⁶ apply? In regard to matters between one man and another. However, in regard to spiritual matters, if [a transgressor] does not repent [after being admonished] in private,⁶⁷ he may be put to shame in public and his sin may be publicized. He may be subjected to abuse, scorn, and curses until he repents, as was the practice of all the prophets of Israel.

טמִי שֶׁחָטָא עָלָיו חֲבֵרוֹ וְלֹא רָצָה לְהוֹכִיחוֹ וְלֹא לְדַבֵּר לוֹ כְּלוּם מִפְּנֵי שֶׁהָיָה הַחוֹטֵא הֶדְיוֹט בְּיוֹתֵר. אוֹ שֶׁהָיְתָה דַּעְתּוֹ מְשֻׁבֶּשֶׁת. וּמָחַל לוֹ בְּלִבּוֹ וְלֹא שְׂטָמוֹ וְלֹא הוֹכִיחוֹ הֲרֵי זוֹ מִדַּת חֲסִידוּת. לֹא הִקְפִּידָה תּוֹרָה אֶלָּא עַל הַמַּשְׂטֵמָה:

9It is pious behavior if a person who was wronged by a colleague would rather not admonish him or mention the matter at all because the person who wronged him was very boorish or because he was mentally disturbed,⁶⁸ [provided] he forgives him totally without bearing any feelings of hate or admonishing him.⁶⁹ The Torah is concerned only with those who carry feelings of hate.⁷⁰

יחַיָּב אָדָם לְהִזָּהֵר בִּיתוֹמִים וְאַלְמָנוֹת מִפְּנֵי שֶׁנַּפְשָׁן שְׁפָלָה לִמְאֹד וְרוּחָם נְמוּכָה אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁהֵן בַּעֲלֵי מָמוֹן. אֲפִלּוּ אַלְמָנָתוֹ שֶׁל מֶלֶךְ וִיתוֹמָיו מֻזְהָרִים אָנוּ עֲלֵיהֶן שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמות כב כא) "כָּל אַלְמָנָה וְיָתוֹם לֹא תְעַנּוּן". וְהֵיאַךְ נוֹהֲגִין עִמָּהֶן. לֹא יְדַבֵּר אֲלֵיהֶם אֶלָּא רַכּוֹת. וְלֹא יִנְהֹג בָּהֶן אֶלָּא מִנְהַג כָּבוֹד. וְלֹא יַכְאִיב גּוּפָם בַּעֲבוֹדָה וְלִבָּם בִּדְבָרִים קָשִׁים. וְיָחוּס עַל מָמוֹנָם יוֹתֵר מִמָּמוֹן עַצְמוֹ. כָּל הַמַּקְנִיטָן אוֹ מַכְעִיסָן אוֹ הִכְאִיב לָהֶן אוֹ רָדָה בָּהֶן אוֹ אִבֵּד מָמוֹנָן הֲרֵי זֶה עוֹבֵר בְּלֹא תַּעֲשֶׂה וְכָל שֶׁכֵּן הַמַּכֶּה אוֹתָם אוֹ הַמְקַלְּלָן. וְלָאו זֶה אַף עַל פִּי שֶׁאֵין לוֹקִין עָלָיו הֲרֵי עָנְשׁוֹ מְפֹרָשׁ בַּתּוֹרָה (שמות כב כג) "וְחָרָה אַפִּי וְהָרַגְתִּי אֶתְכֶם בֶּחָרֶב". בְּרִית כָּרַת לָהֶן מִי שֶׁאָמַר וְהָיָה הָעוֹלָם שֶׁכָּל זְמַן שֶׁהֵם צוֹעֲקִים מֵחָמָס הֵם נַעֲנִים שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (שמות כב כב) "כִּי אִם צָעֹק יִצְעַק אֵלַי שָׁמֹעַ אֶשְׁמַע צַעֲקָתוֹ". בַּמֶּה דְּבָרִים אֲמוּרִים בִּזְמַן שֶׁעִנָּה אוֹתָן לְצֹרֶךְ עַצְמוֹ. אֲבָל עִנָּה אוֹתָם הָרַב כְּדֵי לְלַמְּדָן תּוֹרָה אוֹ אֻמָּנוּת אוֹ לְהוֹלִיכָן בְּדֶרֶךְ יְשָׁרָה הֲרֵי זֶה מֻתָּר. וְאַף עַל פִּי כֵן לֹא יִנְהֹג בָּהֶן מִנְהַג כָּל אָדָם אֶלָּא יַעֲשֶׂה לָהֶם הֶפְרֵשׁ וִינַהֲלֵם בְּנַחַת וּבְרַחֲמִים גְּדוֹלִים וְכָבוֹד שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (משלי כב כג) "כִּי ה' יָרִיב רִיבָם". אֶחָד יָתוֹם מֵאָב וְאֶחָד יָתוֹם מֵאֵם. וְעַד אֵימָתַי נִקְרָאִים יְתוֹמִים לְעִנְיָן זֶה. עַד שֶׁלֹּא יִהְיוּ צְרִיכִין לְאָדָם גָּדוֹל לְהִסָּמֵךְ עָלָיו וּלְאָמְנָן וּלְהִטָּפֵל בָּהֶן אֶלָּא יִהְיֶה עוֹשֶׂה כָּל צָרְכֵי עַצְמוֹ לְעַצְמוֹ כִּשְׁאָר כָּל הַגְּדוֹלִים:

10A person is obligated to show great care for orphans and widows because their spirits are very low and their feelings are depressed.⁷¹ This applies even if they are wealthy. We are commanded to [show this attention] even to a king's widow and his orphans⁷² as [implied by Exodus 22:21]: "Do not mistreat any widow or orphan."
How⁷³ should one deal with them? One should only speak to them gently and treat them only with honor. One should not cause pain to their persons with [overbearing] work or aggravate their feelings with harsh words and [one should] show more consideration for their financial interests than for one's own.⁷⁴ Anyone who vexes or angers them, hurts their feelings, oppresses them, or causes them financial loss transgresses this prohibition.⁷⁵ Surely this applies if one beats them or curses them.⁷⁶
Even though [a person who violates] this prohibition is not [liable for] lashes,⁷⁷ the retribution one suffers for its [violation] is explicitly stated in the Torah (ibid. 22:23): "I will display My anger and slay you with the sword."⁷⁸ There is a covenant between them and He who spoke and created the world⁷⁹ that whenever they cry out because they have been wronged, they will be answered as [ibid.:22] states: "When they cry out to Me, I will surely hear their⁸⁰ cry."
When does the above apply? When one causes them suffering for one's own purposes. However, it is permitted for a teacher to cause them suffering while teaching them Torah, or a craft, or in order to train them in proper behavior. Nevertheless,⁸¹ he should not treat them in the same manner as he treats others, but rather make a distinction with regard to them and treat them with gentility, great mercy, and honor for [Proverbs 22:22] states: "For God will take up their cause."
This⁸² applies to both those orphaned from their father and those orphaned from their mother.⁸³ Until when are they considered orphans in the context [of this mitzvah]? Until they no longer need a mature individual to support, instruct,⁸⁴ and care for them and are able to see to all their own needs by themselves, like other adults.⁸⁵

Sefaria: Torat Emet 363 · Public domain · sefaria.org

Sefaria: Mishneh Torah, trans. by Eliyahu Touger. Jerusalem, Moznaim Pub. c1986-c2007 · CC BY-NC · sefaria.org